A Mother’s Love is Forever …

 

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It will soon be Mothers Day and I have lost her

She slipped away through my fingers

as I held her fragile hand

Lying there in that sterile room

Where she didn’t want to go

I thought it was best for her  – I was scared – didn’t know what else to do

Pass her on to the experts – they would know what was required for you

But in the end they did not – could not help you

We trusted strangers to care for our most precious gift from heaven

They let you down

We let you down

I let you down….

Now it is too late – you are gone!

But you live on in my heart – nothing can destroy that bond of love

So Mum here is a small token  – instead of a card – a beautiful red Rose for you

For Mothers day

Because even though you are in Heaven I still love you and think about you every day.

 

 

 

 

 

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What are we living For?

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It’s Monday morning

in January….

I’m feel low today

everything looks grey.

The TV in the corner

Shows multi-coloured dreams

Blue skies and sunbeams

Other people’s live’s

Not mine!

 

 

 

 

Letter To Mum and Dad….

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Dear Mum and Dad,

I am writing to you a letter because I miss you both very much.  I want to see you so desperately, that it hurts.

All those days, when you lived in your house across the road from me, I never realised it wouldn’t last. You were just there, always there. I took it for granted.

Now as I look back I wish I had cherished you more, spent more time with you, because its gone. Happy moments, over tea and custards, in the morning. We talked about everything and nothing!

Then it all went wrong!

Dad got ill, then left us bereft. Crushed! Empty!

We carried on as best we could….

didn’t we Mum?

I was angry inside, and so sad. Took it out on you, but I did not know it,

Should have taken better care of you! Hate myself for it.

But you were so sweet and loving to us all, if I could only turn back the clock things would be different.

You only realise what you had when you lose it!

I love you both, and miss you.

Things will never be the same ever again! My heart has two scars, from the hurt your leaving caused.

I hope one day we can meet up again in heaven…until then it is Adieu….

But never Goodbye!

From your daughter Sharon xxx

 

 

 

The Source… Names and how we perceive them…

Do you believe in a higher power or intelligence?

Do you accept there is one God? One Creator? Or maybe you follow many different named Gods or Goddesses? Maybe you believe in no gods.

Names can be misleading. When we give a name to someone, we are then identifying that particular person. We also add a ‘surname’ for further clarification. Maybe a nickname is also added.  In most cases this is enough to serve our needs. We all understand who the person is; they have indistinguishability.

But when we speak about God or Deity it becomes more difficult. There are so many different names.  Are we to understand, then, that there are many different Deities?  Or is it that we all speak a different language, and choose from its specific lexis? Are we all speaking about the same phenomenon?  When you get to the root of all religion and sweep away all the rituals, rites, traditions and cultural influences; when you look behind all the New Age revelations, and everything else in between, whats left?

The unnameable ….unutterable..that which can’t be identified as indistinguishable?  Why? Because ‘it’  is the ‘source’ of all that is. All that is includes everything that we know and everything we don’t know….we can’t give a name to the ineffable…

I do not intend to go into a deep discussion about Religion, and I certainly do not mean to offend or criticise beliefs.  The reason for my musings were sparked off this morning after pulling out a card from one of my inspirational teachings packs.

I have been so excited recently, by the discovery of Abraham Hicks . I have added a link to their website. I am sure that they won’t mind me sharing this.  Ester and Jerry Hicks have been sharing the Abraham Hicks spiritual teachings since 1986! So this is not new. Just new to me!

Anyway, I bought a card set called,’Ask and it is Given cards’. The card I pulled out at random, today, was about ‘The Source’. That is what prompted me to write this blog post today. It says:

‘What If Source Were Standing In My Physical Shoes?’ on the front, with a nice folksy bright picture.

On the back is an excerpt from the actual Abraham teachings, which were channelled, or inspired, or whatever you want to call it, through Ester Hicks, by non-physical intelligence, which collectively named itself ‘Abraham’.

Abraham states that it is not our job to make things happen in our lives.  We just need to decide what it is that we want. Then keep ourselves ‘in alignment’ with our desires.  We need to  ‘consciously feel our way into alignment’. Or if it feels good you are on the right path. Listen to  your emotions.

Abraham tells us that we are all part of and connected to The Source, and that we are here in the physical world to experience joy.  That we are all-powerful creators who have the ability to create our own reality….to live life how we wish….to be free to choose…we just need to follow our bliss!!!

Bring it on!!!

 

 

 

So You Want To Be Happy? Let’s Start Today!

Well a Happy 2017 to you!  I am sorry to have taken so long to write.  It has been a difficult time over Christmas…too many empty chairs at our table… health issues…sadness…battling with so many emotions…overwhelmed!!!

But you don’t want to hear about all that, I’m sure!

I don’t know what to write about today, but I just wanted to re-connect.  A new year, a fresh start?  I so want to be happy. How about you?  Is it possible to become happy when suffering from depression, anxiety, grief and chronic pain, diabetes and high blood pressure?  I wish I could just get on with living.  Everyone has their own problems to deal with; we are all in it together, this thing called life.  We all have different lessons to learn.  On the surface, it can seem unfair.  Some seem to have it all, a charmed life…others have horrendous difficulties.  But we can’t and shouldn’t compare ourselves with other people. We don’t know their story.

Happiness is found within, apparently…not ‘out there’.  So how do we get to it?  How can you overcome the gnawing pit of misery that robs you of joy every day.

‘You have to ‘decide’ to become happy,’ the positivity brigade state with all the authority of idealistic simplicity.  Simples!!! Then everything will fall into place.  Life will become rosy… the Universe will divert all good things your way.

Ok, so I now ‘decide’ to be happy!  Are you with me?

From this day…Wednesday 18th January I will be happy.  There, I’ve said it!

I am happy today in every way!

I look for the joy in every small moment!

I fill my life with gratitude!

Watch this space!!!!15658900_1285923268096879_1154569158_o

 

 

Warning!!! Taboo subject… Facing up to the D subject…will it ever get any easier?

Grief: When a Loved One has died and you are struggling to come to terms with life without them….

 

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Losing a Parent or loved one is a devastating event for most of us.  Something that you never get over.  It will change you as a person.  Life will NEVER be the same!

Death is a subject that we don’t like to talk about.  Taboo.  Sweep it under the carpet.  Morbid.  We don’t like to think about our own mortality.  But sometimes we can’t avoid it.  It is one of life’s certainties!

I have been pretty open about the subject, since a young age.  Fascinated by the questions it poses. wanting to know more.  I have studied it from different angles, various religious perspectives, and finally come to a place where I am happy to accept that once the body can no longer function, it dies.  But that is not the end of the story.  The life force, spirit, soul, the ‘I’ that has a body, the real ‘you’; what happens to that part?

I truly believe that we are more than our body, and that part of us is indestructible. That the intelligent, thinking, feeling, person is not just a lump of grey matter that stops existing when the brain shuts down.  I am sure that our ‘essence’ lives on in another reality.  This is being revealed, now, by the new physics.  Particularly by workers in the field of Quantum Physics.Quantum link

This is all very exciting and interesting, but whatever your beliefs, you are still going to feel a huge emptiness for those people who have gone.

I have been struggling to come to terms with the death of my Mum, who died in April 20014.  It has been a very dark and difficult time.  Not wanting to leave the house, because of all the memories that meet me on every corner.  Her house is directly across from ours.  All the places we went together are now out-of-bounds to me.  Her books, jewellery, bric a brack, photos, etc, now clutter up my own house.  It’s too early to bear to part with them.

But yesterday I conquered one of the hardest challenges on my road to acceptance….

The hospital records that I ordered, the day she died.  A great thick wad of documents, sealed in a grey plastic envelope, that has sat on top of a bookcase for nearly two years.

I was too scared to open them.

But for some time they had been on my mind.  I felt the urge to look.  To look for answers…reasons for why she died.  She had been taken ill suddenly; always healthy and active, she suddenly complained of being breathless one Sunday morning. We took her to the hospital and she never went home. In intensive care, hooked up to a ventilator, and unable to speak again to us.  She was dead within a month.

Yesterday I opened the packet and read the notes.  I now understand just how ill she was, and how hard those Doctors and Nurses worked to try to help her.

I think I have turned a corner!  I think I am now beginning the healing process towards acceptance.  I will never get over losing Mum, but I can begin to move on with my life.  I feel different about it today.  I can begin to accept, now, that her body was unable to support her any longer.  It was her time to leave.  It is my time to say goodbye to her, now.

Her Spirit is free now, to continue in another life, and I have to allow her to move on.  So today is that day when I learn to let go….I will always miss her…and will probably still cry forever more….but its time to move on.